Mindfulness Mode

Benjamin W. Decker is a meditation teacher and social activist mentored by Marianne Williamson. He's the bestselling author of four meditation books, including his newest book, Modern Spirituality: A Guide to the Heart of Mindfulness, Meditation, and the Art of Healing, which articulates a spiritual awakening taking place around the globe – and you can be a part it.

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Contact Info

• Website: www.BenDeckerMeditation.com
• Instagram: @BenjaminWDecker
• Twitter: @BenDecker

Most Influential Person

• Dr. Ronald Alexander, Author of Wise Mind, Open Mind

Effect on Emotions

• Mindfulness really helps me experience my emotions. With one of my clients, I sometimes would say before the sessions, are you excited? He used to say, yes, I'm excited.
• Then we did a mindfulness exercise where we would say, instead of identifying with our negative emotions, we would say that they're present. For example, frustration is present, impatience is present.
• My client now says, yes, there is excitement. It gives that breathing room so you can be an observer of your own life.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Breathing is everything. It is the key anchor. What I love about it is this notion that as we breathe in, we taking in pranic energy, life force energy that animates the body. Then we're releasing it back to its source.
• This idea that when we look into each other's eyes, we're breathing from that same source of life force energy. 

Suggested Resources

• Book: A Politics of Love by Marianne Williamson
• Book: Modern Spirituality by Benjamin W. Decker
• Book: Practical Meditation for Beginners by Benjamin W. Decker
• Book: Daily Mindfulness by Benjamin W. Decker
• Book: Meditations On Christ by Benjamin W. Decker
• App: n/a

Bullying Story

• In high school, I was so insecure and I didn't realize how insecure I was until I became secure a long time later. I was also navigating a challenging identity crisis around religion and my sexuality, puberty, and the cosmos, all at once. I went to three high schools in four years and my family moved around a lot.
• I had endured some trauma as a child so I was in therapy as a teen but I never quite felt I could trust my therapist.
• I was also in the priesthood and sort of felt like I was living multiple lives sort of like I had created almost a mild sense of dissociative identity disorder where I was sort of living these different personalities. None of them were really even me. They were me playing out something that I had seen or I thought I was supposed to do so people would like me.
• A memory that completely evaporated into the past and I completely forgot about was resurfaced when an old friend of mine reached out and said, you did something when we were in tenth grade and it really hurt me. What happened was, a friend of mine, a young woman I was going to school and church with, there was a rumor that she made out with this guy.
• I said, I heard that you and so and so were making out at the football game. She said no and I said, are you sure? You don't have to lie to us. She said, no, that didn't happen. After that, I made a couple jokes about it.
• One of the important things that we do in mindfulness is start to experience things from another person's perspective.

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JV Crum III Interviews Bruce Langford on how to use mindfulness to discover your true purpose in life. Bruce explains his TIME acronym and how it relates to finding your purpose in life using mindfulness and meditation.

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Contact Info

• Website: www.consciousmillionaire.com
• Website: www.MindfulnessMode.com
• Podcast: Conscious Millionaire Podcast
• Book: Conscious Millionaire by JV Crum III (Free Download)

Meaning of Mindfulness To You

• I define mindfulness as living in the moment and thinking in the moment. If I'm focusing on the past I know that is going to pull me away from my purpose and from the focus that I really need to have.
• If I'm worrying about the future and what might be coming up tomorrow, or even in a few minutes, then that's pulling me away from the present moment and from being a mindful person.
• To me, being mindful is living in the moment and also not being judgmental.
• It's so easy for us as humans to be judgmental of other people and of other situations. It is really a natural part of being human. But when I do that, I notice it and I pull myself back from it.

Your First Thoughts About Purpose

• When I was around 11 years old I started thinking of time passing, the importance of time, and what that meant. What was that concept of time?
• I remember so clearly that I would spend time reflecting on what certain things meant in the world. And that's one of the reasons why I use the TIME acronym.
• Time has everything to do with mindfulness, of course.

Thoughts About Your Purpose

• Throughout my life I have had a dream where I'm leaving my body and I'm rising up and looking down and seeing myself down there on earth. I'm looking at myself from this incredible position way up in the universe. That is what gave me the perspective that I'm here for a reason.
• That reason is to help other people find their purpose and to use aspects of mindfulness to do that, to help them understand how they can do the work, how they can reach out to others because of that TIME acronym.
• Learn from authors, learn from speakers, learn from friends, surround yourself with like-minded people. And as you're moving on your journey in life, you will understand more of what your purpose really is from other people who are looking for similar answers.

The TIME Acronym

• The T is about together. And I think for too much of my life, I felt like I had to do it myself. That was a real learning step for me. And so I teach other people that you can do this together with other like-minded people.
• The I is Inner work. You must do the inner work. You need to write, you need to explore those thoughts that are running through your mind. You need to give yourself the time and space to really understand what's important in life.
• A lot of times we don't spend enough time in nature and that will help us get clear on our goal and life's direction and understand what our true purpose is because it's not going to come all at once.
• A lot of it comes to me through writing. So that inner work is incredibly important.
• M is meditation. I feel like everybody meditates in their own way. You might have been taught formally. You might do TM, transcendental meditation. Meditation is a huge part of this picture. And you can use an app like the calm app that will help you learn how to meditate. There's Insight Timer where you can get yourself a meditation teacher right there on the app. You need to start. You need to take action. Maybe you've never meditated, or maybe you have meditated sporadically, but I really feel it's important to meditate on a regular basis. Make it part of your routine, part of your habit, make meditation a part of your life. That is just so integral to what you do and how you think.
• E is Exercise. Move your body. Make sure that you're not stagnant. Make sure to move every day. Your body is created to move and some of your biggest revelations will come to you when you move. Your brain starts to operate differently when you move.

Related Episodes

• 000 Bruce Langford: Mindfulness, Bullying and a Passion for Helping Others
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Pat Alva-Kraker is a corporate expert after having enjoyed a 35-year career in the IT industry. She was faced with a series of challenges that altered her professional life forever including being let-go from a major technology company, her husband of 22 years suddenly passed-away, their shared 200-acre exotic animal ranch business had to close its doors, and an experience with cancer. Pat is now a breast cancer thriver and has experienced her own journey to elation. Along the way she realized she can inspire other women to own their feminine power creating a successful business and affirming their right to financial freedom while creating a life they love. Pat has recently authored the book, Katherine's Quest: One Woman's Journey to Elation.

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Contact Info

• Website: www.MajesticCoachingGroup.com
• Book: Katherine's Quest: One Woman's Journey To Elation by Pat Alva-Kraker

Most Influential Person

• Wayne Dyer

Effect on Emotions

• Mindfulness has effected my emotions in the fact that I can choose to either see what happens in my life as good or bad or just neutral. Mindfulness has taught me that everything is neutral until I give it meaning. 

Thoughts on Breathing

• Breathing is so critical. If there is any one self-care tool I would teach it would be breathing.
• It would be just taking four deep breaths, holding it for four seconds, out for four.
• That is an important tool when you have a sense of anxiety or you are getting ready to do something that requires a sense of creativity, it's just, connect with your breath.

Suggested Resources

• Book: The Abundance Project by Derek Rydall
• Book: Katherine's Quest: One Woman's Journey To Elation by Pat Alva-Kraker
• App: Insight Timer / Calm

Bullying Story

• In the man's world, it's very analytical. When you start talking about, this is what my intuition says, you get this ‘look'. There's immediate resistance. I didn't necessarily get bullied, but I got immediate resistance.
• Their eyes and their body language said, that's not the way we do things here. You get to a point where I no longer want to be in this environment if I can't really bring all of who I am to business.
• Then you start having discussions with women about, don't be afraid to be intuitive and use your sixth sense to get things done and to really have your heart guide you in the discussions that you have with your boss, with your clients, with your team members.
• Let that be a major part of how you do business because that's where we do our best work.

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Rock Thomas is the Worlds #1 Whole-Life-Success Expert, bestselling author, and host of the #IAmMovement Podcast. From farm boy to real estate and business guru, mentor and self-made millionaire, Rock has studied one-on-one with the worlds best teachers: Tony Robbins, Jack Canfield, Wayne Dyer, Robert Herjavec and more, on his mission to inspire others to create their best life, on their terms. His Goalcast video alone was viewed by over 100 million people. Using tools and strategies that are proven, Rock now teaches people how to create financial freedom by leveraging their purpose and passions to live not just a successful life, but a fulfilled one. Founder of the #IAmMovement, he is known as the man who redefines lives.

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• Website: www.RockThomas.com
• Podcast: Rock Your Money, Rock Your Life
• Book: Epic Life Blueprint by Rock Thomas
• YouTube: @RockThomas
• email: rock@rockthomas.com

Most Influential Person

• Tony Robbins / Amandi Gerri

Effect on Emotions

• When emotions go up, intelligence goes down. What emotions do I actually want to experience? If I'm going to go golfing, what emotions to I want at play? Do I want to be playful, serious, competitive? I chose my emotions before I go out.
• When I don't chose my emotions, I'm reactionary. When I go into a meeting I chose my emotions ahead of time, like, I'm going to be direct, or forthcoming, or conciliatory. So I do my best to chose my emotions off a menu before an event.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Through yoga, there's always breathing through the nose and out.
• Through my meditation practice I learned ways to breathe.
• I've done some work with Wim Hof and learned about increasing the oxygenation to the cells.
• I also recently did some work with Dr. Amy who taught me how to breathe again through my belly.

Suggested Resources

• Book: Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender by Dr. David Hawkins
• Book: The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer
• Book: The Surrender Experiment by Michael A. Singer
• App: Calm

Bullying Story

• Recently I started a company with a few friends and I ended up getting bullied out of the company.
• When I was having a corporate meeting at a board table, my girlfriend was in the other room and she could hear what was going on. When I came out I said, ‘that was a bit of a tough meeting'. She said, ‘honey, that wasn't a tough meeting, you just got gang-banged'.
• They were really out to get blood. They had this calculated.
• The biggest thing I've learned is to slow down. The slow way is the fast way. Hire slow, fire quick. Get into partnerships slowly.

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Joel Primus is an entrepreneur at heart who enjoys working with other entrepreneurs and is empowered by building companies. In 2008 he started Naked and after 10 years sold that business, filmed a documentary, and wrote his first book, scheduled to be published in Jan 2021.  His documentary is entitled, ‘2016 The Year of Fear’, and is about  the importance of travel as a way of educating children to become citizens of the world.

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• Website: www.JoelPrimus.com
• Blog: https://joelprimus.com/blog/
• Book: Getting Naked By Joel Primus
   

Most Influential Person

• Tim Ferriss / Jason Gordon, Dr. of Chinese Medicine Alchemical Courtyard / Sam Harris

Effect on Emotions

• Mindfulness gives us the freedom and the choice to love and hate, to react or not react.
• Mindfulness gives us the space to make that choice. In most cases it gives me the moment of pause I need to not react as much as I maybe otherwise would.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Breathing is THE tool that allows our mind to calm. I am not a fancy breather. I do write some blogs about Wim Hof and this and that and there are some really great techniques out there for falling asleep, there's box breathing, but I'm pretty old school.
• If I just put all my focus on the breath coming into my nose and focus on nothing more than the sensation of that feeling, once, twice, three times, I feel a million times better.

Suggested Resources

• Book: Awareness: The Perils and Opportunities of Reality by Anthony Demello
• App: Sam Harris App; Waking Up / Kevin Rose App; Oak
• Book: Getting Naked by Joel Primus

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Claire Dale and Patricia (Pat) Peyton are directors of an organization called, Companies in Motion. They offer Physical Intelligence coaching and training to prominent industry leaders. Claire is a well-known British dancer and choreographer, having founded the Claire Russ Ensemble, a contemporary dance company that performed across Europe for fifteen years. Pat’s expertise is business; she spent over thirty years working with Fortune 100 companies to help individuals and teams improve their performance. She is also managing director of a leadership and sales training company called Sphere International. Claire Dale and Patricia Peyton have authored the new book, Physical Intelligence: Harness your body's untapped intelligence to achieve more, stress less and live more happily.

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Contact Info

• Company: Companies In Motion
• Website: www.CompaniesInMotion.com
• Blog: www.companiesinmotion.com/feed
• Podcast: www.companiesinmotion.com/podcast

Most Influential Person

• Pat: My Mother

Effect on Emotions

• Claire: Mindfulness kind of is an emotional state, so it is the emotions of calm and peace, non-reactivity, resourcefulness.
• I grew up with a disabled sister so there was a lot of worry in the household and I think by watching my mom get really worried to un-pick what was going on even at that early stage, and know that I needed to seek mindfulness.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Pat: Start paced breathing now. There's research that talks about a group of bankers that 62% improvement of cognitive function, 42% decrease in stress after 40 minutes of paced breathing a day, 20 in the morning, 20 in the evening.
• If that's too much for you in one go, do what you can. I top and tail my day with it and then build it in before a zoom call or while I'm making a pot of coffee or tea.

Suggested Resources

• Book, Claire: The Relaxation Response by Herbert Benson
• App, Pat: Calm / Headspace / 10% Happier

Bullying Story

• Claire: I was twelve years old, in a school cloakroom when two older girls come up and they push me. I fall back into all the coats. I'm a newbie in the school, and I'm looking up at them, and these young women in their fourth or fifth year are trying to exert their power.
• They're telling me that I need to watch it, and that they're watching me. I have no idea really, what they mean but I'm scared and my heart rate is way up. I do nothing until they leave me alone.
• They were likely having a surge of oestrogen and a whole lot of testosterone and their cortisol rose. They were feeling aggressive and like they were needing to throw their weight around in order to prove themselves. I don't believe they were bad girls. So they chose to pick on someone younger and weaker.
• I didn't have very much testosterone or estrogen at that point. I wasn't expecting any kind of confrontation so my arousal chemistry just wasn't there. My testosterone stayed right where it was at a low level, but my cortisol spiked way up and I began to feel terrible anxiety.
• What mindfulness does is keep all that cortisol band of arousal so we have enough energy to keep our skin in the game but we don't get threatened that's why it's so important for a peaceable, tolerant world.

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John Robertson helps leaders navigate crises and build culture. He is referred to as a workforce wellness and culture alignment specialist, working in the field of forward-thinking leadership. John provides guidance to develop a values-anchored framework based on trust and mindful centered communication. He has over 30 years experience in crisis intervention, leadership, and culture transformation, and has worked with clients in numerous communities, first responders, First Nations, and international trauma and crisis boards service.

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Contact Info

• Website: www.Fortlog.co

Most Influential Person

• My wife

Effect on Emotions

• When it comes to dealing with people in crisis, it's pretty simple for me to come in as some distant professional, and sometimes that means to show no emotion.
• My journey has taught me that sometimes that's the worst thing to show as a professional. Sometimes things just stink and there's nothing we can do. I still remember doing a death notification of a woman, her son was in college, an only child and her husband had died in the country that she had come from.
• She was telling me about her son. All I could think of was, this poor woman. And I can remember tearing up and part of my journey is, big boys don't cry. My heart really ached for her. It allowed me to be with her. And it was a newspaper article, a couple of weeks later, that I cut out and gave to my wife because in the newspaper there was a thank you and it was written on the worst day of my life. I spent the early morning hours with an angel.
• My wife didn't believe it was me at first, but when I connected who that person was with her on the worst day of her life. What did I learn about mindfulness and about being present, about not being cognitive but not being a jellyfish just to own what I'm really experiencing and then addressing my mindset to say, I can't fix this, so I am going to be with her and just hear her stories.
• This is where mindfulness can be a very subjective definition. For me, mindfulness allows me to be present in that moment with that mindset that says, what is the best thing that I can do right now to help.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Here's where my dark humour gets me into problems. Do not start smoking. However, I teach deep breathing from the smoking perspective because smokers do three things that we have to learn: 1. they take a break, 2. they are outside with social support, and 3. they're doing deep breathing exercises.
• A smoker who might be really stressed as they are exhaling will blow rings. That even slows the exhale down more. The smoke break principle is the triangle model:  inhale for 5, hold for 5, exhale for 5.

Suggested Resources

• Book: n/a
• App: www.MindfulnessMode.com

Bullying Story

• I sucked my thumb till I was seventeen. I quit during the summer when I was a junior forest ranger up in northern Ontario. I was bullied for sucking my thumb to the point where the school would call my parents and say that if I didn't stop sucking my thumb, I would be bullied more.
• Having sucked my thumb for that long, I believe that it prepared me to deal with opposition in a way that doesn't always beat me down.

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Penelope Lane is a Clinical Psychologist, Personal Trainer and Mindfulness Teacher with over 30 years experience in her private psychology practice, running exercise groups and teaching mindfulness. Penelope focuses on helping women over the age of 45 to effectively integrate exercise, mindfulness and self-compassion into daily routines for optimal physical, mental and emotional health. Penelope conceived the idea of combining meditation sessions in gyms over 30 years ago but didn’t go ahead with it due to a crisis of confidence and having young children. After revisiting the idea several years later, Fit Healthy Grounded Women was born, with its flagship program – The Fit Tone Flex System.

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• Website: www.FitHealthyGroundedWomen.com

Most Influential Person

• My therapist

Effect on Emotions

• Now when I feel something, I name it; anxiety, sadness, anger, and there's a buffer, like a boundary, that has created a veil. It's there, but I'm not engaged in it.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Breathing is my anchor. Breathing is my mindful process that I pay attention to. When I'm out and about in my life I notice that I'm in my head and there's lots of thoughts and I also notice that I'm holding my breath.
• Then I use a deep breath to bring myself back around to the present moment.

Suggested Resources

• Book: The Gift Of Presence by Caroline Welch
• App: Headspace

Bullying Story

• I was bullied in Primary School. I was fat and and I had pimples and my surname back then was Boyle, so it was Penny Boyle.
• I was called horrible names and a few years later I developed anorexia which is a very common pattern. I was very shy and withdrawn and mindfulness has really helped my self-confidence.
• I was aware back then of what we called the observer so there was a part of me that could observe what I was doing but I didn't know what to do with that.
• If I'd had mindfulness back then, I think I would have related to my emotions and thoughts in a different way rather than using the repression of food to have that emotional control over my life and it would have helped with my self-esteem too.

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Work With Bruce

Have you been trying to lose weight or quit smoking? Maybe it feels hopeless, and discouraging. You’ve tried so many ways to make these changes. I am now trained and qualified in hypnosis and I use mindfulness combined with hypnosis to help you reach your goal. I’m starting a Beta Test program. The first 3 ppl to email me will have the opportunity to participate in this Beta program, and you’ll not only reach your goals, but you’ll get one-on-one help from me for 50% off the regular price. I’ve lost 35 lbs since January with the help of hypnosis and it feels like a miracle. Hypnosis worked for me, it can work for you. Email me at bruce@mindfulnessmode.com for a free 45 min call to answer all your questions.

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David Wood is a former Consulting Actuary to Fortune 100 companies, including Sony Music, Chanel, and Exxon. David left his cushy Park Avenue job 20 years ago to build the world’s largest coaching business. He became #1 on Google for life coaching, serving an audience of 150,000 coaches, and coaching thousands of hours in 12 countries around the globe. Alongside his clients’ successes, David is no stranger to overcoming challenges himself, having survived a full collapse of his paraglider and a fractured spine, witnessing the death of his sister at age seven, severe anxiety and depression, and a national Gong Show! He was nominated to the Transformational Leadership Council alongside such thought leaders as Don Miguel Ruiz, John Gray, and Marianne Williamson. David coaches rockstar entrepreneurs to double their revenue faster, overcome Shiny Object Syndrome, and be a more extraordinary entrepreneur and human.

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Contact Info

• Website: www.Focus.ceo

What Are You Focused On?

• One thing I've chosen to focus on is my health. When I get into something, I get into it.
• I'm working with an energy healer who's got me running in my underwear, in the snow, barefoot. He says, do 72 steps in the snow, barefoot and it will help your energy.
• I'm having cold showers each day. I'm doing exercises snacks and after this interview I'll go on the chin-up bar and do some pull-ups just for a minute. That's one example of focus, and it feels good to me.

What Anger Are You Holding?

• I don't identify it as anger, but I think almost all of us have some. For me it occurs as frustration. I've been living with anxiety and depression for twenty years. I had some trauma as a kid which apparently is still impacting me.
• After twelve years ago I started feeling tired quite often and had some trouble sleeping. I've tried so many different things to work on my energy and it's working to the point that I can sit here with you and it feels good right now.
• About three o'clock this afternoon I'll probably do a meditation and then hopefully I can go out and be with friends, but sometimes I can't. I would think that after fifteen years of working on this, I would have power over it.

Bullying Story

• After high school, and when I discovered personal growth, and I discovered communication, and I discovered tough conversations, my coach kept encouraging me to clean up my past and make lists of people that I resented and that I was holding anger against.
• So I would make the lists and then my coach said, now you have to call them. Through good coaching I managed to find my way to call a guy that I used to like and we were friends, but he would bully me. He would make fun of me in class and he would put me down and get the other kids riled up against me.
• I didn't want to call him because I thought he would think I was an idiot. My coach said, start with that. And so I called him and said, I was afraid to call you because I was afraid you would think I was an idiot.
• I told him, I felt pushed around and bullied and belittled by you at school and I've been holding onto that for twenty years.  I just wanted to let you know.
• He said, what can I say or do now to help us move forward? I couldn't believe that this guy I thought was such a jerk, could say something like that.
  

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Work With Bruce

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Mindy Gorman-Plutzer brings 25 years of experience to her private practice as a Certified Functional Nutrition and Lifestyle Practitioner and Eating Psychology Coach. Mindy’s life experience and training inspired her to create a framework that combines functional nutrition, positive psychology, and mind/body science; introducing a compassionate resolution to physical and emotional challenges resulting from chronic and complex health issues, as they relate to Eating Disorders. Mindy is the author of The Freedom Promise: 7 Steps To Stop Fearing What Food Will Do TO You and Start Embracing What It Can Do FOR You.

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• Website: www.TheFreedomPromise.com
• Book: The Freedom Promise: Seven Steps To Stop Fearing What Food Will Do TO You and Start Embracing What Food Will Do FOR You by Mindy Gorman-Plutzer

Most Influential Person

• Louise Hay

Effect on Emotions

• Mindfulness allows me to now give myself permission to feel my emotions. I don't fear them, I feel them. And I let them pass through. And I have learned to give myself that space and that grace to not always have to feel wonderful. Perfection is only a perception and it's usually not rooted in reality.

Thoughts on Breathing

• Breathwork grounds us. I believe that it's virtually impossible to be truly mindful without being grounded.
• Proper breathwork, conscious deep breathing, also activates the parasympathetic part of our brains which is part of our central nervous system.
• It regulates so many functions of our body and when we're in the parasympathetic state, also known as rest and digest, we are doing just that. Our bodies are in the flow.

Suggested Resources

• Book: You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay
• Book: The Freedom Promise: Seven Steps To Stop Fearing What Food Will Do TO You and Start Embracing What Food Will Do FOR You by Mindy Gorman-Plutzer
• App: Calm / BrainTap

Bullying Story

• I bullied myself for so many years. I belittled my needs. I bullied myself into believing that I wasn't enough as I was.
• I bullied myself in such a way that belittled my needs for food and proper nourishment. I thought that I could buy my ‘enough', by denying myself.
• That for me was a form of bullying and self-betrayal. It wasn't until I went through that dark period that brought me to this period of light and self-discovery did I realize that until I found my enough and reclaimed it.
• As I said in the book, the freshly baked brownie, the glass or two of wine, the new pair of shoes, was never going to do it.
• What I needed to do was to dig deep and find what I like to refer to as my sacred space of solitude where I could dig deeper than myself.
• For me that became my higher power, my deepest self where I knew I was safe.
• And what does someone who is bullied want? They want to feel safe. They want to feel they belong. If you think about the bully, the bully is really a coward.
• My bully was my eating disorder self who needed me to believe that I needed her or else I couldn't function. That is what a bully does.

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