396 Lasting Happiness Secrets With TM Hoy

January 28, 2019

TM Hoy is an author with a fascinating story. His books include, Lasting Happiness, Rotting in the Bangkok Hilton (Skyhorse Publishing), and The Nature of Religion (Pan Publishing). Originally from California's Silicon Valley, he became a gemologist after college and worked in the jewelry industry for years. He traveled extensively throughout Europe and Asia and kept homes in Bangkok and the northern Thai city of Chiang Mai. It was at his home in Chiang Mai where a fateful event happened which caused his life to suddenly veer in a radically different direction. Today he lives in Tucson, Arizona where he enjoys the breathtaking mountain views daily along with his freedom to write. You can find TM Hoy online at LastingHappiness.net

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Most Influential Person

  • Thomas Moore

Effect on Emotions

  • It's been a wonderful thing. It has enriched my life a lot, I think mainly because I feel a lot more connection to the surroundings, and in daily life, I try to spend time pausing for beauty and looking at the beauty of the natural world.
  • I'm very fortunate, Tucson is a lovely town, and we've got the Catalina mountains and the Santa Ritas, so we're surrounded by mountains, the clouds, the sun. It's just a very beautiful place and I take enough time to really pause and take that in, and that to me really is the core of mindfulness, being able to appreciate your daily life.

Thoughts on Breathing

  • Breathing is an Absolutely crucial [part of my mindfulness].. Whenever you feel a little bit tense or a little bit upset or any kind of stress at all, just do a quick little minute or two exercise where you count your breaths. That's all.
  • So for me, whenever I begin, it always begins with, 'Take a deep breath. Hold it for three seconds, release it for three seconds' and you do that pattern.
  • And the next thing you know, everything becomes manageable again and you're focused and you're in the moment. That breathing exercise helps calm the mind down and that is a crucial part of any meditation exercise.

Suggested Resources

Bullying Story

  • There's a lot of conflict in prisons and violence and conflict are kind of at the core of that experience because you get a lot of people that really are rule breakers and you get them all together and stuff them in one room and they're not allowed to leave. That's prison.
  • So there was this one guy, and this was in Texas, in a prison in Texas, who just couldn't get along with anybody in his cartel member. And he would, he would bully because he was a very large guy and worked out a lot.
  • Making a long story short, he was picking on one guy who is kind of small and thin, a native American kid. It was on the weight pile and there was a number of us that were around that really liked this kid. He was a good kid, from one of the tribes there in Texas. And we just said, "You know what, we're not putting up with this anymore."
  • And we surrounded this guy in the middle of this session where he's belittling this kid and really, really overbearing. And we surrounded him and were just like, "Look at yourself. Look at who you are. You're 280 pounds of solid meat. You bench press 500 pounds. And here's this kid who's 100 pounds and you're bullying this kid. What are you doing? Look at yourself. Who are you?"
  • And the shame of the group, the ability of the group to just focus their energy and saying, "You know what, you are so close to being an outcast, we are done with you. We are so sick of this." That had an enormous impact.
  • He went quiet, he gathered up his things, he left and he was a lot more reflective and a lot more thoughtful and that, of everybody just dirty looking him, giving him a hard time, and saying this is not acceptable behavior, and that bringing the present moment, that mindfulness moment, if you will.
  • Interfering there had a real impact and it had an impact on other people that had that kind of personality as well, because they saw what happened that, and this is the essence of society, is that if you have a group of people that share the same kind of values and vision, that they really can make an impact, really can have an impact on your surrounding.
  • Even in a society that's violent and sort of out of control like a prison. When you mentioned bullying, I thought immediately of that little get together where we were like, "No, no, no, we're done. This is enough."

On-Line Course

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