Mindfulness Mode

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Increase your calm, focus and happiness so you can be more relaxed, contented and satisfied with your life. For business, entrepreneurs, educators, parents. Hosted by Bruce Langford.

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Sunday Jun 06, 2021

Hit Your Emotional Reset Button

Sunday Jun 06, 2021

Wouldn’t you love to be able to just reset your brain? Are you like me? Are there times when there are so many thoughts swirling around your brain, and you just want them to stop? We talk about the self-bullying that a lot of us have going on in our brain and this is what it feels like so much of the time.

Are you receiving alerts that something is wrong? I’ve received alerts in the past that something is wrong and I had no idea what the alert meant.

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Are you receiving alerts that something is wrong? I’ve received alerts in the past that something is wrong and I had no idea what the alert meant.

I’ve learned that when I see an alert on my printer, it definitely means something. It’s out of paper or it’s low on ink. I know I have to deal with it, or else I’m not going to be doing much printing.

Is Your Trouble Light Flashing?

The same is true in my car. I once ignored an engine light on a car I was driving, and I ended up being stranded on a 4-lane highway, with a hot, steaming engine. That wasn’t much fun.

So I learned that when a warning light on the dash lights up, the responsible thing to do is to actually deal with the problem that the warning light is referring to.

Our emotions are like those warning lights on the car. I’ve heard people call them trouble lights, because they usually warn you of trouble brewing somewhere.

I’m sure you’ve seen them, lights that refer to overheating: Low Tire inflation, Door Ajar, Tailgate Ajar, Windshield Washer Low, Engine Coolant Level Low, Fuel Level Low.

Your Personal Trouble Lights

Did you know your emotions are like those warning lights? Emotions are the human body’s way of telling you something needs attention.

With the human body, the warning lights are in the form of emotions like anger, pain, guilt, sadness, stress, frustration, and loneliness, among others.

Experiencing Pain?

If you experience pain, you’d better do something about it. If it’s anger, or anxiety, or loneliness, or sadness, you can take action and do something to deal with that emotion too.

None of those emotions are bad, they’re just happening to tell us that something is going on that we need to deal with. Sometimes we think certain emotions are bad or negative, but if you figure out why the emotion is happening, you’ll likely come to the conclusion that it’s not necessarily bad, or good, it just is.

I have to admit, there have been times when I just want to take a piece of black tape and stick it over the Engine Warning light on certain cars I’ve had. I just wanted to pretend that warning light wasn’t appearing, and sometimes, I’d convince myself that the light itself was malfunctioning and there really was nothing wrong with the car.

Covering Up Emotions

I’ve done that with my emotions sometimes. I’d get angry, and I’d want to cover it up and pretend it wasn’t there. What do we do to cover up our emotions? We get ‘Crazy Busy’, doing things that help us forget about the anger. Sometimes, we shop, or go on a trip, or use a substance. That substance might be food, marijuana, booze, cocaine, crack or other drugs. Those substances help you forget that your warning lights are on. They can help us forget, at least in the short term, but usually we end up with way bigger problems as a result of covering up the emotion in the first place.

But how do we actually deal with the emotion without pushing it away or pretending it isn’t there?

Taking Action

Fortunately, there are a lot of things you can do.

A lot of you would likely talk to a trusted friend. How great do you feel when you’ve had a chance to really share what’s bothering you with someone you like and trust? I think we’re supposed to lean on each other for help and to hopefully be able to be vulnerable enough to open up and vent what we’re feeling emotionally.

Some people talk to a counselor or therapist. That can certainly be helpful. Another thing that can help immensely is to write. Pour your thoughts out in the form of words, either on paper or computer screen. This is one of those activities that, for me anyway, I have to make it a habit. I have to write on a regular basis or else I drift away from it and all of a sudden realize I haven’t written anything in three or four weeks.

Another way to get to the bottom of what your emotions are telling you is to bring some nature into your life. Immerse yourself. Go for a swim in the ocean. Or drive through the mountains. Really, any way you can get into nature can help you work through your emotions and start feeling better again.

Give yourself some time and space away from your everyday life and embrace nature. Let it help you heal and renew yourself.

Meditation is another way that we've talked a lot about on the show. I've included some links to specific shows where we talk about meditation. It can make a huge difference in your life

Sharon Salzberg Quote

“We can’t control what thoughts and emotions arise within us, nor can we control the universal truth that everything changes. But we can learn to step back and rest in the awareness of what’s happening. That awareness can be our refuge.” Sharon Salzberg

The Incident Happened

There’s one other way. Find what has triggered your emotional warning lights and change your thinking around that trigger. The event or incident happened and we can’t change that. What we can do is change our thoughts surrounding the event. Change how we think about what happened.

Some of those incidents were devastating or traumatic and our brains actually pushed them out of sight. We can’t even remember in our subconscious mind what happened. It’s still in there, but it’s buried. Through hypnosis, that incident can be found again, and we can attach different thoughts to what happened.

I can tell you an example. Last year, I had a client who had a huge amount of anxiety. She didn’t know why, but when I hypnotized her, she took me to a place where she was 6 years old and she and her father were alone at home and she was drawing the Union Jack for school. She was having trouble and her dad started to lose his patience because she was not drawing it right. He started yelling at her and one of the things he said was, “are you dense? It’s simple, just do it right.”

That was the first time her dad had talked to her like that, but it wasn’t the last.

As strange as it sounds, my client was able to quickly change her thinking pattern so that every time she replayed that recording in her mind saying “are you dense”?, she replaced it with a different statement, a positive statement that empowered her, that made her feel confident and strong.

After that, she trained her mind to encourage herself, every time a doubt message would pop into her brain.

She told me later, she said, it was simple to do, but I couldn’t do it without help. I felt powerless to change that inner bully and stop it from the constant putdowns.

Hit Reset

You can Hit Your Emotional Reset Button, and you can do that by noticing your emotions and then dealing with them. Make up your mind to do the work. Promise yourself you’ll take action. This is the weakest link. This is where more people fail than at any other step and this is true for me too. In the past, I would read the books, watch the videos, hire the coach, but sometimes just not take the required action at the right time. When is the right time? I’ll bet you know instinctively. The right time is now. Make up your mind to be assertive. Decide what you’re going to do and make it a habit. Write down your plans and by writing it down it will become more real and concrete. If you need help, ask someone who can help you that you trust. If no one pops into your mind, give it some thought.

You CAN deal with your Emotions. You CAN confront your Inner Bully. You CAN hit the emotional reset button after your emotions have served you. Whatever you decide to do, please something. Take action. If you know in your gut that I’m the one to help you, send me an email, bruce@mindfulnessmode.com with “Reset Button” in the subject line. Then I’ll know you heard me on this episode. We’ll have a 30 minute Zoom chat and see if it’s a fit for you to work with me. All the very best to you, Bye now.

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Special Offer

Have you been trying to break through a mind block? Are you discouraged? It’s not hopeless. YOU CAN DO IT. I coach people just like you. I’m Bruce Langford, a practicing hypnotist, and I love to help people just like you! Feel good about your life and accomplishments. Regain confidence. Book a Free Consultation to get you on the road to being grounded and centered. Email me: bruce@mindfulnessmode.com with ‘Reset Button' in the subject line.

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