April 14, 2021
Michael Defern is a singer/songwriter, author, and video producer. He first became interested in mindfulness and awakening through the Twelve Steps, a tool he used to help maintain sobriety. Fifteen years later, Michael has sought to expand mindfulness into all parts of his life, including business, performing, writing, and raising kids. He owns a video production company with his wife, Heather, where they help business owners create content that digs deeper to connect with their audience, which is the subject of his recent book, How To Connect: A guide to creating content that resonates with your ideal client.
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Most Influential Person
Effect on Emotions
- Mindfulness has been a life-changer in terms of communicating with my wife. There were so many things, especially financial things, where I would come at it in such a passive-aggressive way.
- I would stand there in the moment with her. What I've learned to do now is get anchored, try not to think at all, and just let it come out. The ability of being mindful has allowed me to respond instead of react.
Thoughts on Breathing
- I need to plug my amazing vocal teacher, Breck Alan. One of his breathing exercises is something I use all the time in mindfulness and meditation.
- If you sit up straight or stand up straight and you pull yourself up from the back of your neck, and you almost tilt your hips back as if you were to put your hands in your back pockets and pull down slightly. You kind of have this reverse arch.
- You experiment and you get your body into the right position. It's called, ‘The Art of Body Singing‘, that's his brand. It's about getting into this position where the breath just comes in without any effort.
- I definitely was bullied. And I bullied. My whole school experience from grade school to high school was one of being completely disconnected in my own head.
- Looking back, there were so many situations, had I had any kind of mindfulness or presence, I would have realized that I took things the wrong way or I would have seen things from the other person's perspective.
- If I could go back to fifth grade and someone did something that upset me, if I had been able to use mindfulness I would have wondered what they were going through to cause them to lash out at me.
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